Thursday, October 25, 2012

Find Me Now Love - First Date

Find Me Now Love Blog Post
First Date
Ah, the anticipation! However it may have developed, you are about to test the waters on a initial date. It may have been a while since you’ve done so. You might be a bit nervous. Whether this is a blind date, a meeting arranged by friends, a personal ad rendezvous, or even a date with someone you've spoken to in person, there are some important factors to keep in mind. Watching your manners, choosing the right dress , handling the tab, conversation skills, even how to get a second date are things to consider.
Before we get there, though, and become preoccupied with our date, there is one crucial element to recollect . Often in the preparation and anticipation, we can forget about #1. That’s right, you – and your personal safety. I’m not suggesting we become obsessive about precautions, merely alert, aware, and prepared. For a first meeting, it is prudent to let a ally or family member know where you're meeting, how long you expect to be, and the name of your date. Touch base with your friend after the date as a courtesy.
If you are to be having a blind date or are meeting an internet date for the first time, it is best to keep personal information, such as the address of your residence, to yourself. For internet dates and dating service dates, be alert for any anomalies between the description the person gave and what you actually see and hear. Though not the norm, be leery of ‘false advertising.’ Use your own mode of transportation to arrive. Pick a public location for this first meeting. Always haul some emergency cash in case you need a cab or need to pay your own way.
In today’s universe , we are blessed with a few technological devices that simplify meetings and safety precautions. One of the best self-protection devices, for dating or traveling, is the cellular phone. Cell phones are easy to carry . Many have a one-touch calling feature. By pressing and holding down one button, you can call a friend , even an emergency assistance number . Always be sure to charge the batteries on your cell phone before leaving for your rendezvous or date. Whether your car breaks down, you're running late, or you need to get out of a sticky situation, a cell phone can be worth its weight in gold. Use your instincts. If you feel uncomfortable on a date, phone a ally from the restroom. Have him or her call you back; it is reasonable to feign a reason for an emergency exit if you're ill at ease.
Very uncomfortable? Tell an employee at the restaurant or establishment. There is no need to be embarrassed. Be honest. In our fast-paced society, it is expected that each ‘meet-and-greet’ might not always go as planned. Be gracious, of course, but take intelligent precautions. Phone and ask a friend to meet you exterior if need be.
That said, you're well-prepared to venture forth. Look forward to your date. Have reasonable expectations. Remember all the wonderful things you are and have to offer and go enjoy.
findmenowlove.com

Wednesday, October 24, 2012

Find Me Now Love - Sex, Women and Men

Find Me Now Love Blog Post
Sex, Women and Men
During my many years of counseling couples, I have frequently worked with the sexual problems that frequently occur in committed relationships. The most common complaint from men regarding sex is frequency, and the most common complaint from woman is lack of emotional intimacy.
There is a very good reason why these are the most common complaints – men and women are very different when it comes to sex!
The biological sexual drive, or lack of it, relates to how much testosterone is present. Men biologically have much more testosterone than women. Men’s biology equips them to be alert for sex most of the time, which is nature’s way of ensuring the survival of the species. Women, on the other hand, often do not experience a biological sexual drive unless they are in the center of their menstrual cycle. This fact can create a large problem in relationships.
I’ve often heard men complain that:
“I think if my wife really cared about me and my needs, she would have sex with me even when she wasn’t turned on.”
“I don’t reach out for sex much anymore because I’m tired of being rejected, but my wife says she wants to be pursued in a romantic way. This feels like a no-win to me.”
“My wife is in control of our sex life . If she wants it, then we have it. If she doesn’t, then I have no say about it.”
I’ve often heard women complain that:
“My husband often comes to me like a needy small teenager , needing me to appease him or validate him with sex. There is nothing erotic about an insecure, needy little teenager !”
“I often feel pulled on for sex, as if having sex is more necessary than caring about me. When I do what he wants, I feel used, and when I don’t, I run into hers anger, resentment, blame or withdrawal. It feels like a no-win.”
“He always seems to be alert for sex, but I don’t feel turned on unless we're feeling close . I can’t just watch TV all evening and then feel like making love.”
The very real issue here, at minimum for most men beneath 40, is that they're biologically motivated and women are mostly emotionally motivated. Heterosexual women get turned on when their man is warm, open, caring, and personally powerful. Most women are not turned on by a man who is closed, distant, angry, blaming, or needy.
The problems of frequency can get resolved as men and women learn to understand and accept each other’s differences. Men need to understand and accept that women are not as biologically motivated as men are. Many women rarely even think about sex, while most men will tell you that they think about sex frequently throughout the day. When men understand that women are turned on by love, romance, emotional intimacy, warmth, caring, and personal power, then men may be motivated to learn to be the fond , powerful and romantic partners that women want and need.
When women can accept that men’s biology is very present for them, they can stop putting men down for it and start supporting their men in creating more emotional intimacy, romance, and personal power. When women criticize men instead of understanding and accepting them, they help to create some of the insecurity that is such a turn off to many women. When a man can appreciate rather than demean him woman for hers sexuality, she can discover ways of meeting his needs lacking feeling used.
Understanding and accepting each other’s differences and needs can lead both men and women toward more satisfying sex lives.
findmenowlove.com

Tuesday, October 23, 2012

Find Me Now Love - Relationship Dating

Find Me Now Love Blog Post
Relationship Dating
Our existence revolves around relationships. We have family relationships, work relationships and romantic relationships. Is your relationship going the way you need it? Before getting involved in a romantic relationship, it is good to ask yourself such questions. Would you like to get into an erotic and short-term relationship only to discover later that the other person is looking for a long-term commitment? Do you feel like dating a person when there is no personal chemistry involved ?
The foundation of a successful relationship depends on the quality time you spend together. What you feel when you are together, how you behave in each other’s presence are important observations to make. Remember, emotions aren't rational; there is no logic to why you like someone and don’t like another. You must watch your own reactions and the responses of the other person sensitively.
There are situations where advice fails to work. Every situation is unique in itself. Lack of communication in a relationship spells doom. The phrase ‘silence speaks’ might work in some cases but not always.
Following three C's are the basis of a successful relationship dating, whether it is brief or long term, erotic or wild:
Communication
Do you feel shy in discussing sensitive issues? Are you the kind of person who waits for the other person to break the ice? This isn't the accurate approach. Conveying things at an earlier stage prevents chaos afterwhile . However a blatant approach might also end up in a disaster. Relationship dating is a sensitive issue. You should handle it with care. Communicate properly and carefully before fixing a date.
Commitment
Be very clear about the commitment level you expect from each other. If you're looking for an erotic relationship, convey it through various indirect gestures at the very outset . You are more compatible if you share similar beliefs and values in your lives. The more likeminded you are, the more deep-rooted your relationship is likely to be.
Cooperation
You must have a great deal of mutual understanding. A successful relationship involves a lot of give-and-take. It isn't one-way traffic; it is reciprocal. Reciprocity increases your compatibility level with each other. Last but not the minimum , sex plays a very vital role in a successful relationship. Sex is a way of expressing your total love. However, before giving expression to your love be very honest with each other. Be very sure about how long you want to haul on!
findmenowlove.com

Find Me Now Love - Are You Moving Too Fast In Your Relationship?

Find Me Now Love Blog Post
Are You Moving Too Fast In Your Relationship?
When I was 16 years old, I was in deep like with a guy I was dating. He was purely the anti-boyfriend of my parents' choosing. He drove a black car with a souped up engine. He smoked cigarettes. He had horrible manners. He would beep the horn for me when he came to pick me up. It drove my mother crazy. I mean actually looking back - he had no respect. But that's not why I'll remember him .
What I'll recollect is that I went to an amusement park one weekend and bought a keychain that had both our names with a heart in between them. I thought it was cute and I thought he'd get a small chuckle out of it. Uh - not! He read me the riot act about how I pressure guys and that I was simply too pushy and that he didn't think this entire thing was going to work out. All this on my own front doorstep. Needless to say, I was devastated.I hadn't known this about myself whether it was his truth or the truth. I carried it with me up until the point I realized that I was in a fully reciprocal relationship .
What's the moral of this story ?
Well, it was kind of pushy for me to purchase a keychain with our names when he wasn't my personal boyfriend and he didn't buy it with me or for me. I was forcing the issue. So take this teenage lesson and apply it to your lives presently - never compel the issue. It only makes you look desperate or clueless.
Tips That You're Moving Too Fast
1. You are thinking about what your children will see like
2. You aren't interested in meeting anyone else and have been dating for a month
3. You quiz him about his incoming calls--everyday!
4. You call him before you give him a chance to return the FIRST call
5. You are leaving things in his residence "by accident" like a toothbrush, underwear, etc.
6. You need to meet his mom and request her stuff about his childhood
7. You WANT to quiz him about his incoming phone calls
findmenowlove.com