Find Me Now Love - Online Dating: A Man's State of Mind

Find Me Now Love Blog Post
Online Dating: A Man's State of Mind
There are untold riches in the form of male companionship waiting for you online if only you'll alter one thought regarding how you'll find success there. Most men have this idea that they're "winning" when they take a man to bed. Somehow, they've won the prize. Think about how this works in your own mind. What are your own thoughts about winning the lottery? One in a million? Worse? How often have you actually won a prize in a contest or drawing? Not many, I'd assume.
And so, if you think of "getting a woman" or even "getting a date" as the prize, your mind will automatically cause you to play in the same defeatist, resigned way you look at a contest. And you'd depend on luck, or making it a numbers recreation . If luck had anything to do with getting women, I'd have none. Towards the conclusion of my marriage, my own wife beat my own self-confidence to a pulp. I thought I was ugly, unattractive, and worthless. I misplaced my husband , I nearly lost my own home , came within a many nickels of actually going broke. . . things were bad .
Very bad . So meeting women, for a while, was not a possibility. But once I created this principal change in my personal mindset, everything changed for me. When you truly understand how women work, you will operate wholly differently than you currently do. Women online are actually there to meet YOU, too. They view a good guy as a prize as much as you view a good woman . So, here is the critical mindset you've to have in order to be successful online: You are actually the prize as much as she is.
By winning him imagination and TAKING HER TO BED, you aren't TAKING anything from her , but GIVING! Success with online dating is about GIVING in order to receive. It’s about Giving women what they want . What they REALLY need , even if they don’t say it outright. It’s about letting women give to you what YOU want . And creating the opportunities for them to do that. It’s about reading between the lines, and talking in-between the lines. And getting in-between the sheets.
It’s about standing out online in such a way that by the time you actually meet, she is already yours. Doesn’t that sound like the right approach to attracting women? To put this idea to work for you, you've got to work on your "pregame" thinking. Build yourself up in your own mind as being worthy (even if right now you don't think you are), as being attractive (even if right presently you don't think you are), as intelligent and funny (again. . . even if there's something you've to overcome, you must believe this to be true). The truth of the matter is, if you don't believe you're the prize, no one else ever will.
There is one danger in all of this. Some guys take this "worthiness" too far , and come across like an arrogant Jerk. Don't do that! Write and communicate with confidence, not arrogance, and you'll become the prize she seeks.
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Online Dating: Why Men Should Be Online

Find Me Now Love Blog Post
Online Dating: Why Men Should Be Online
Men, if you don't already have women chasing after you every day, then you ought to be dating women online. Here are the Four most compelling reasons why men should be seeking out and meeting women online, and one reason why they absolutely shouldn't.
1) Online dating is the most amazing gift to men invented since woman herself. (Well, most women.) Think about it for a moment. For one small flat fee (and sometimes for no fee at all) you can scope out women, learn what they like, what they don't like, check out their picture and actually start swapping emails, IMs and talking with them. Here's what you don't have: To get dressed up; to gas up your car; to spend hours of your prime time; to buy drinks for folks you don’t' know; to fail in public. On balance, it's a beautiful convenient and effective method of meeting women.
2) There are MILLIONS of women ACTIVELY LOOKING for you online. They are not coy "bar chicks" or girls with boyfriends . They are what we call in marketing, HOT LEADS. Smoking hot! Because they're coming out to meet you half way. You just have to learn how to become the bait they're seeking. Now, there are two basic reasons women are there on line. Some are there to see for a guy to marry. Some are looking for a guy to just hook up with. But that attractive much explains guys, too. So no matter what reason you're looking for women, there are women looking for you, too.
3) Women online range from not-so-hot to super-hot. I have personally hooked up with some of the most beautiful women of my life from online. And any cursory tour through one of the better sites will exhibit you – this is not a side option for single guys – it’s a MUST DO! So the attractiveness of women online attractive much mirrors the attractiveness of women anywhere, right? Well, that's to be expected. But when you are at a bar or club trying to meet women, you only have a many dozen to choose from at most. And everyone is going to be hounding the hot ones. Online, you've got those MILLIONS to choose from. What's even better is that you can search for them by location, income, religion. . . all this stuff you can get out of the way before you even say Hi.
4) Online dating is THE place to practice your recreation . Whether you still remember awkward Junior High School dances like it was yesterday, or you effortlessly meet and hookup with women all the time, Online is the place to practice without personal rejection. There are lots of great techniques for meeting and seducing women. Whatever "way" you are, or whatever "technique" you select , you'll have more time to practice it online. Whatever you do, learn from your mistakes as well as your successes. Not everything is going to work each time, and you shouldn't expect it to. One other great advantage to online dating is that you don't have to fear rejection.
These women you approach don't know you. Your friends aren't there to watch you crash and burn. So, you can take risks that you wouldn't normally take if you were talking to a man in person. And that means you'll succeed more than in person, too. Maybe. But there is one reason NOT to go online to meet women: Being closed minded. You are going to be exposed to lots more women online than you've ever seen before. If you are closed minded when you write or talk with them, you're sure to fail. If you are not willing to get out of your rut and try one thing different, to learn something unused , then you are sure to fail.
If you don't learn how to hear and peruse women's profiles properly, to truly comprehend what they mean in their profiles or emails to you, you're sure to fail. So, don't be closed minded. Online dating is the single best method for meeting women today if you approach it properly. Done wrong, it can lead to the same results you've always had, and that may not be what you want .
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Find Me Now Love - Emotional Intimacy

Find Me Now Love Blog Post
Emotional Intimacy
Sex... There, I've said it... There are two major hot buttons for couples that come to see me: sex and money (we'll get to money in another article). People will not generally state it up front. It feels distant too shameful to approach right off. But eventually I find that the sexual part of their existence is ho-hum, less than satisfying, a subtle power game , or a hostile battlefield. This is distant from the lusty, passionate and even sweet experience of movies and advertisements. So, what's going on in the bedroom?
First, let me assure you that many couples have a sexual life that is very fine. If you're in that category then great! If not, then peruse on. Most of us know that men and women have very different notions about sexuality. The stereotype is that men are just fascinated in bodies and women just want emotional closeness. And our culture encourages these stereotypes. However, there's also a lot of truth in them. Men, I'm going to tell you one thing you'll probably not hear anywhere else. So, listen up. At age 18 the hormones in the body work just fine.We'll immediately get an erection if we look at a naked woman .
But, by the time we reach middle age this natural biological function has actually dimmed. Except for the men with the highest of sex drives we all find that the pump has to be primed with: Emotional Intimacy. This means that we talk with our partner, look deep into her eyes, listen to what she's about and (yikes!) tell her about our deepest fears, failings, and desires to succeed. Women have known this stuff all along. My husband has always had a saying, "Love me in the kitchen, if you expect me to love you in the bedroom."
She doesn't mean grope her in the kitchen. She means to partake of life with him , to know him deeply, and to make sure she gets this message all day long. Women, it's a terribly frustrating experience to have your partner experience impotency. If you're secure and caring you want to assist him so much, but the assist is difficult to come up with. If you're insecure you might start to believe it is you're fault and you're just not woman enough to turn her on. The genuine problem is usually a lack of priming the pump.
And by that I mean real serious emotional intimacy. And generally , your partner doesn't have a clue to what this means. Usually we men learn about this stuff from you women. So, where's the 1,2,3 easy response ? Sorry to disappoint you. There isn't one. I might lose readership over this, but you need to hear the truth. Emotional intimacy requires a lasting commitment to entering the other's life in deeper and deeper ways. There are books and books written on this, but who follows the advice? So, here is your assignment for afterwhile today: Tell your partner about a fear you've never mentioned. Make sure it is one that you don't want to bring up.
Make sure it is a challenge to you. Regardless of the reaction, know that you've just taken a step of maturity that can ultimately be the step to a genuine turn on!
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Find Me Now Love - Fun Dating Or Serious Dating

Find Me Now Love Blog Post
Fun Dating Or Serious Dating?
When contemplating this question, it might occur to you eventually that dating might actually be both. After all, teenagers and those in their adult years have gone through this rite of passage called dating, and this is a natural activity, just as social interaction is part of each person's existence . While all our actions go through the cause and effect wheel, there's no reason why you shouldn't enjoy a good date as much as your next-door neighbor. There are probably a lot of questions in your mind -should you be a first-timer teen, or someone who's gone back to the dating pool -regarding dating. But don't fret! Here are some basic pointers on how to go about dating the hassle-free way:
Contemplate your reasons.
Just why are you deciding to whirl into the world of dating? It could be that you are looking for that special someone, make new friends and acquaintances, get intimate with someone, or simply experience what it's like to date. You could even be doing it for more complicated reasons -to try to forget your ex, find someone to marry, to hook up with that person you've been attracted to for years. Whatever the reason is, just make sure that it still borders on the healthy and positive. Date for the right reasons, reasons that will enrich your existence and let you have fun. Most all, do it for yourself, and not just because you are being pressured into doing it.
Find your prospects.
If you've already gone through the first tip, then we're already in business! The good news is, this dating step is relatively easier. The advent of the universe wide web has ensured that you can go online and sign up for dating and matching services in a matter of minutes. You'll discover that there are quite a lot of people out there who are too looking for people to meet, date and have fun with. Prep up your online profile and advertise, advertise, and advertise some more!
Chances are, after wading through all the email from your prospective dates, you'll have quite a handful that you'll want to meet up with. And if you're not an internet fan, you might too try the old-fashioned way of having your friends set you up with common friends. This has the added advantage of meeting up with someone who's not actually a total stranger -and if you have any awkward moments during the date, you might always start off the conversation by talking about your mutual friends.
The big "D". It's finally time for what you've started to refer to as "The Date" -and you find that you're actually nervous. Don't panic. Things are about to get more exciting. But first , some practical dating concerns:
1. It would be best to set the date in a place considered common ground. This way, you have the security of being able to get elsewhere in case something goes wrong. His or him pad may be totally romantic, but make sure to make safety your initial priority. There are still a lot of odd characters out there, after all.
2. It's also the best time to make sure you're clean and presentable. Even if you don't have the funds to splurge on that fabulous outfit, nothing beats over-all, good hygiene. Fashionable shoes can only do so much if you didn't even bother to brush your teeth. Dress as the occasion calls for. After all, getting ushered out of that fancy bistro for not following the dress code bombs out your date before it even begins.
3. Even before you begin being charming to your date, make sure you extend the most gracious gesture of all, which is to arrive on time. This is one of the most basic dating etiquette you must adhere to. Not only does this ensure that you don't end up with a grumpy date, you'll also be able to let your date know that you put in some effort by being there on time.
4. All you need to be successful in dating is to be as courteous to your date as you, yourself, wish to be treated. From here on and after, matters would already depend on how you interact and, more importantly, if you two have any chemistry. But for now , best relax and attempt to have as much fun as you can.
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